


Pointless Discussion

by mnkm



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Gen, One Shot, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-06-07 19:11:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15225969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mnkm/pseuds/mnkm
Summary: Honoka found a bird, and she wants to name it. Umi and Yukiho were not amused. Especially Umi.





	Pointless Discussion

**Author's Note:**

> Reposted from FanFiction.

"And so, I was wondering," the iconic orange-haired girl of the popular school idol group began. "What should I name the bird I just got?" Honoka asked. She was in her idol club room, with a certain childhood friend sitting in front of her and her little sister to her right.

Umi frowned. "Did you even ask your family for permission to keep the bird, Honoka?"

The leader nodded. "Yep!"

Yukiho stared at the older sister, puzzled. "Didn't Mom say no?"

Hearing this, Umi's glare intensified towards Honoka, and eyebrow raising.

The orange haired girl looked away, a nervous laugh escaping her lips. "...well, I _did_ ask them..." she said. "...it's just that they might not have said 'yes'... you know?"

"Honoka, at least get a confirmation before deciding such pointless things."

Said girl pouted. "Well, whatever. Anyways, I have an idea for a name."

Yukiho gave her sister another odd look. "Didn't you just ask what it should be named?"

"Forget the details, sister of mine." Honoka smiled and raised a finger. "Anyhow, I propose we name this bird _'_ _Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke!'_ " she suggested.

Amidst the idea reciting, Umi stared at her friend with her jaws dropped. "That's... how'd you even... but... you're...!" She was completely shocked Honoka not only came up with the stupidest name idea ever, but even remembered all the words to begin with. She just couldn't find the words to express her disbelief towards her friend.

"No, that's stupid," Yukiho said. "In the first place, why would you give a bird such a name like _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke?'_ " she asked.

Umi then stared at Yukiho in shock. "How'd..." she began to sputter, but rubbed her in chin thoughtfully. "Nah, you're a normal sister. Not surprised you can remember that. Honoka, on the other hand..."

"Hey!" Honoka yelled. Then she turned to her sister. "Well, Yukiho, think about it. Everyone will think our bird is amazing!" she said. "Think of how any birds out there have such an amazing name like _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke?'_ " she asked.

"I mean... that's not that cool of a name," Yukiho responded. "It's just really long, that's all. Who'd give special attention to a bird just because it's named _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke?'_ " she said.

"Damn it Yukiho, stop being logical or realistic!" Honoka exclaimed. "You've got to widen your field of possibilities. There might be someone who'd be impressed at a bird being named _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke!'_ " she said. "And if our people won't like it, we've always got foreigners to be impressed!"

"Yes, yes," Yukiho nodded along with sarcasm. "Those foreigners would certainly be amazed by our long-named bird rather than our amazing inventions. Because they're totally more fascinated by a bird named _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke...'_ "

"Shut up, sister of mine!" Honoka exclaimed. "There's nothing wrong with naming it _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke!'_ "

Yukiho pouted. "And yet there's no point in naming it _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke!'_ "

"I'm going to make my decision final and name it _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yabura-'_ "

_-THUD-_

The two whirled around to see their forgotten blue haired friend, who had- along with her chair- fallen unconscious onto the club room's grounds.

"M-Miss Umi!?" Yukiho shrieked and ran over to the bluenette.

Honoka shrugged. "Umi's such a weirdo. ...I'm still naming the bird _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke'_ , though."

"Oh, hush."

* * *

Kotori giggled. "A ridiculously long name? That's what Honoka wanted to name a bird?" she asked. "Now I really want to know what the name was!"

Umi sighed, clutching her head in pain."Don't bother... it's amazing those two even actually remember the whole thing," she groaned. "I can't even remember the first seven words..."

"That's kinda impressive already, Umi."

"Not the point, Kotori." The bluenette looked out the window, the night sky having robbed everyone of their sunlight. "It's absolutely ridiculous for _our_ Honoka to even be able to remember that kind of name in the first place, I feel as if those two are just trying to increase the word length of the chapter."

Kotori voiced confusion from her side. "...what?"

Umi winced. "Y-yeah, sorry, I don't know what I'm saying either. I must be going crazy from those two..."

"Hmm, well, I wish I was at least invited too..." her friend finally said.

"You were having a meeting with your mother, it couldn't be helped." Umi then raised an eyebrow. "Did you perhaps think of a name for the bird too?"

"Sure did!" Kotori said cheerfully. "I got two ideas. The first one is to just name it after me- Kotori!"

Umi thought about it. "...that'd be somewhat adorable but confusing. What's the second idea?"

Kotori chuckled again. "Well, it's a long name I learned some time ago," she said.

The bluenette smiled. "I'm sure it can't be as long or bad as Honoka's ridiculous idea."

"Yeah, I'm not sure what Honoka thought of. But here's _my_ idea- ready?"

"Sure."

"I was thinking of naming it..." Kotori took in a deep breath. " _'Jugemu Jugemu Gokou-no Surikire Kaijarisuigyo-no Suigyoumatsu Unraimatsu Fuuraimatsu Kuunerutokoro-ni Sumutokoro Yaburakouji-no Burakouji Paipo Paipo Paipo-no-Shuuringan Shuuringan-no Guurindai Guurindai-no Ponpokopii-no Ponpokonaa-no Choukyuumei-no Chousuke.'_ "

Silence.

"...Umi?"

Umi's eyes rolled to the back of her head as she fell backwards, unconscious.


End file.
